"I never thought I would see the day where it would take an intervention from God to rescue a mere man from your grasp. It’s about time somebody put you in your place, Morri!” Lugh is dancing a jig, laughing and holding onto his belly.
I look at Tyr, he winks at me. As I turn my attention back to the Morrigan, my bewilderment knocks hard against the center of my being. Did I really kill my…? Is this my punishment to be judged by those I mocked as beings only a fool would believe in? Why am I worth the effort? I know my guilt, punish me already and have it done!
I didn’t realize I had said that last sentence screaming like a roar from deep within, the gong knocked by bewilderment ringing loudly to silence even the god’s bickering.
“I had prayed to any god that would hear me to help me find the right path. I prayed to all gods, inner and outer, above and below, the One and All that they call the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and End; I have heard no answer but the emptiness echoing within my own soul. I have looked within to find that the weeds of despair have been sown amongst the garden of my soul, and the Light Eternal that once nourished me in my youth is gone, nowhere to be found. The seeds that once grew to spring fruits of the spirit have all been robbed by bandits who worship greed over honor. The fires of sin and hate have burned what had once been a glorious wood full of all the creatures of the universes to the roots. The wellspring of Eternal Life that I had once drank deeply from has gone to drought. The body that is the instrument of the self to play out Creation’s glory is broken, and out of tune. My Great Grandfather once told me that we will be judged how we judged not only others but ourselves in front of the All of Alls. That the Great Assembly will be witness to the soul lain bare after all it’s cycles and be held accountable for all its deeds. I know of only one life that I have lived, and I had done my best, but failed in response to my ultimate duty to Life. I had become everything that I had never wanted to be, everything that they wanted me to be. I had turned my back on my Grandfather’s teachings and had become lost and astray. When I found myself in the Pit of Death, who answered before sorrow choked out my heart and I succumbed to those weeds of despair? I care not for anyone’s decree because I judge myself Damned, let me be in my misery. I am a coward and a fool, there is no mercy for me.”
As I spoke the Morrigan’s dark energy faded and her cloak of mists covered her like raven’s wings. She walks towards me down invisible steps, as light as panther at play. She is looking at me eye to eye by the time I finish, with a great sorrow etched upon her face.
“Child, oh Child, you know not of what you speak. You have forgotten all that you’ve been taught. Nature’s roots run deep and after a fire has destroyed all that is old and decayed, new growth can form. Death is not the End of All Things it is the transition from one state to another, I am the Aspect that was acknowledged by your ancestors. The Universal Trinity of Power, Wisdom, and Love have given me Decree to Choose your Path. You prayed to any who would answer and it was all of Creation that did.” She looks over my shoulder and I follow her gaze to a young man in a woolen long coat, a newsboy cap, that glowed with the radiance of a Saint. He had his left hand held in the two of his lover next to him, with her head resting on his shoulder. She glowed with the same radiance, and I stood in wonder that I had not noticed them before. “Somebody interceded on your behalf.” Her right arm pops out of her cloak, straight out and palm upraised. “Apparently you are very dear to this Holy Sage, for you were his charge in your infancy and it was he who tended the garden of your soul as you grew into manhood.”
The man and woman smile at me with all the love that I ever remembered. I take a step towards them but Tyr puts his hand upon the center of my chest. “Not now, son,” he whispers, “it’s not time for you to do that yet.” He looks at the Morrigan, “you’ll get the proper opportunity soon. You have a Duty to attend to.” Rage starts bubbling in my chest, I take a deep breath to respond but he cuts me off cleanly. “You will have your time. If you truly believe in Justice then you know that it all comes around in due time. What is Death to one who knows that it is not the end? Be a man, do your Duty, and God will reward the Soul.” Tyr pushes me back towards my seat. “You asked for this, now stand for it.”
I turn back towards the Morrigan and chokingly say, “Ma’am, what shall you have me do?” I bow my head and assume military parade rest.
In a soft though solid voice, heard by all the Assembly, she spoke and it was written upon my Spirit. “You shall walk the Lonely Path, the one that few dare to walk. You will bear witness to your life, beginning until the end, one more time. You will remember the lessons that you were taught, that you turned away from, and the roots from those seeds that were planted within your soul will spring new life. Through toil of the mind, heart, spirit, and body will you produce new fruit and again share the teachings that you were given. You will bare your shame in front of the world of men for judgement, and they will scorn you, revile you. You will be betrayed by the beliefs that you once held on to in your darkest days, and even those days will be as bright as midday to the ones that you will see ahead. Your companions that cross your path will not understand, because they have not needed to reach that far in this lifetime, but just like you had to be inspired to continue in your darkest days, your infinitesimally small light will shine in the infinite darkness for a moment of brilliance and you will give mankind a glimpse of it’s most terrible self. No other test of courage or honor is greater than that of facing the worst of what we are with an open heart. We will all witness your fall from grace and it will be up to you to walk to Path that I place before you. The Death you seek will not be an end to this mortal coil, but to all you have ever been.” She leans forward and kisses my forehead, lifting my chin so I can look into her eyes. “So be my Decree.” She straightens herself, looks searchingly into my depths. “Do your ancestors proud.” She turns around and walks back up to her seat of judgement.
A man in kingly garments stands up in the Jurors stand. “By the Balance of Light and Shadow, we who represent that within you, the masters of the hidden worlds, uphold this Decree. We require this one to study as a Disciple of War, rather than a simple student through experience. He must dedicate all towards the this end.” He looks in my direction. “The tenants of the ancient warrior masters must be the bastion wall of your soul, just as the wisdom of your grandfather is your foundation. The mind will be crafted into the blade, the body it’s handle, the tongue it’s edge, and the heart the force behind it to slay the ignorance that lay within. The pillars that will uphold your bastion will be Sincerity, Justice, Faith, Philanthropy, Heroism, and Love. The fruits that will be produced in the garden of your soul will be Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Fidelity, Gentleness, and Self-Control. In all manners of conflict you will strive to represent Rectitude, Courage, Mercy, Respect, Honesty, Honor, Loyalty, and Character. For these must you build; must you toil; must you forge, in Power Divine, Supremest Wisdom, and Primeval Love. For these are things eternal, and eternal shall they endure.”
He sits down and the Shadow of a Woman stands, her voice drips with malice supreme. “To the Void must you give up your desires, wishes, happiness and unhappiness. To find the true transmutation of the self one must suffer the Dark Night of the Soul. Your emotions will be the chemical mixture, your thoughts the sturrer of the pot. Purifying this mixture will be your task, and the invisible hands of the Three Fates of Past, Present, and Future are your avenue to finding the ingredients you need. You will bleed, you will break, you will reform and heal then bleed and break again and again until the process is completed and all that you are is liberated.” She sits down, not another word is said.
I look at Tyr, he winks at me. As I turn my attention back to the Morrigan, my bewilderment knocks hard against the center of my being. Did I really kill my…? Is this my punishment to be judged by those I mocked as beings only a fool would believe in? Why am I worth the effort? I know my guilt, punish me already and have it done!
I didn’t realize I had said that last sentence screaming like a roar from deep within, the gong knocked by bewilderment ringing loudly to silence even the god’s bickering.
“I had prayed to any god that would hear me to help me find the right path. I prayed to all gods, inner and outer, above and below, the One and All that they call the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and End; I have heard no answer but the emptiness echoing within my own soul. I have looked within to find that the weeds of despair have been sown amongst the garden of my soul, and the Light Eternal that once nourished me in my youth is gone, nowhere to be found. The seeds that once grew to spring fruits of the spirit have all been robbed by bandits who worship greed over honor. The fires of sin and hate have burned what had once been a glorious wood full of all the creatures of the universes to the roots. The wellspring of Eternal Life that I had once drank deeply from has gone to drought. The body that is the instrument of the self to play out Creation’s glory is broken, and out of tune. My Great Grandfather once told me that we will be judged how we judged not only others but ourselves in front of the All of Alls. That the Great Assembly will be witness to the soul lain bare after all it’s cycles and be held accountable for all its deeds. I know of only one life that I have lived, and I had done my best, but failed in response to my ultimate duty to Life. I had become everything that I had never wanted to be, everything that they wanted me to be. I had turned my back on my Grandfather’s teachings and had become lost and astray. When I found myself in the Pit of Death, who answered before sorrow choked out my heart and I succumbed to those weeds of despair? I care not for anyone’s decree because I judge myself Damned, let me be in my misery. I am a coward and a fool, there is no mercy for me.”
As I spoke the Morrigan’s dark energy faded and her cloak of mists covered her like raven’s wings. She walks towards me down invisible steps, as light as panther at play. She is looking at me eye to eye by the time I finish, with a great sorrow etched upon her face.
“Child, oh Child, you know not of what you speak. You have forgotten all that you’ve been taught. Nature’s roots run deep and after a fire has destroyed all that is old and decayed, new growth can form. Death is not the End of All Things it is the transition from one state to another, I am the Aspect that was acknowledged by your ancestors. The Universal Trinity of Power, Wisdom, and Love have given me Decree to Choose your Path. You prayed to any who would answer and it was all of Creation that did.” She looks over my shoulder and I follow her gaze to a young man in a woolen long coat, a newsboy cap, that glowed with the radiance of a Saint. He had his left hand held in the two of his lover next to him, with her head resting on his shoulder. She glowed with the same radiance, and I stood in wonder that I had not noticed them before. “Somebody interceded on your behalf.” Her right arm pops out of her cloak, straight out and palm upraised. “Apparently you are very dear to this Holy Sage, for you were his charge in your infancy and it was he who tended the garden of your soul as you grew into manhood.”
The man and woman smile at me with all the love that I ever remembered. I take a step towards them but Tyr puts his hand upon the center of my chest. “Not now, son,” he whispers, “it’s not time for you to do that yet.” He looks at the Morrigan, “you’ll get the proper opportunity soon. You have a Duty to attend to.” Rage starts bubbling in my chest, I take a deep breath to respond but he cuts me off cleanly. “You will have your time. If you truly believe in Justice then you know that it all comes around in due time. What is Death to one who knows that it is not the end? Be a man, do your Duty, and God will reward the Soul.” Tyr pushes me back towards my seat. “You asked for this, now stand for it.”
I turn back towards the Morrigan and chokingly say, “Ma’am, what shall you have me do?” I bow my head and assume military parade rest.
In a soft though solid voice, heard by all the Assembly, she spoke and it was written upon my Spirit. “You shall walk the Lonely Path, the one that few dare to walk. You will bear witness to your life, beginning until the end, one more time. You will remember the lessons that you were taught, that you turned away from, and the roots from those seeds that were planted within your soul will spring new life. Through toil of the mind, heart, spirit, and body will you produce new fruit and again share the teachings that you were given. You will bare your shame in front of the world of men for judgement, and they will scorn you, revile you. You will be betrayed by the beliefs that you once held on to in your darkest days, and even those days will be as bright as midday to the ones that you will see ahead. Your companions that cross your path will not understand, because they have not needed to reach that far in this lifetime, but just like you had to be inspired to continue in your darkest days, your infinitesimally small light will shine in the infinite darkness for a moment of brilliance and you will give mankind a glimpse of it’s most terrible self. No other test of courage or honor is greater than that of facing the worst of what we are with an open heart. We will all witness your fall from grace and it will be up to you to walk to Path that I place before you. The Death you seek will not be an end to this mortal coil, but to all you have ever been.” She leans forward and kisses my forehead, lifting my chin so I can look into her eyes. “So be my Decree.” She straightens herself, looks searchingly into my depths. “Do your ancestors proud.” She turns around and walks back up to her seat of judgement.
A man in kingly garments stands up in the Jurors stand. “By the Balance of Light and Shadow, we who represent that within you, the masters of the hidden worlds, uphold this Decree. We require this one to study as a Disciple of War, rather than a simple student through experience. He must dedicate all towards the this end.” He looks in my direction. “The tenants of the ancient warrior masters must be the bastion wall of your soul, just as the wisdom of your grandfather is your foundation. The mind will be crafted into the blade, the body it’s handle, the tongue it’s edge, and the heart the force behind it to slay the ignorance that lay within. The pillars that will uphold your bastion will be Sincerity, Justice, Faith, Philanthropy, Heroism, and Love. The fruits that will be produced in the garden of your soul will be Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Fidelity, Gentleness, and Self-Control. In all manners of conflict you will strive to represent Rectitude, Courage, Mercy, Respect, Honesty, Honor, Loyalty, and Character. For these must you build; must you toil; must you forge, in Power Divine, Supremest Wisdom, and Primeval Love. For these are things eternal, and eternal shall they endure.”
He sits down and the Shadow of a Woman stands, her voice drips with malice supreme. “To the Void must you give up your desires, wishes, happiness and unhappiness. To find the true transmutation of the self one must suffer the Dark Night of the Soul. Your emotions will be the chemical mixture, your thoughts the sturrer of the pot. Purifying this mixture will be your task, and the invisible hands of the Three Fates of Past, Present, and Future are your avenue to finding the ingredients you need. You will bleed, you will break, you will reform and heal then bleed and break again and again until the process is completed and all that you are is liberated.” She sits down, not another word is said.
No comments:
Post a Comment